I’ll never understand them. I came to the internet/world of social media, specifically starting on Tumblr, to connect with others who have my cranky views on cancer. Very early on I began interacting with someone who wound up being exposed as a fake. I was not particularly hurt by the incident, just kind of saddened.
Luckily, I did not interact with this most recent faker. I followed her for a time, but quit because her numerous inspirational posts were just not for me. So I am fortunate to not have the very hurt feelings I am seeing expressed by other cancer patients on Tumblr.
As my name, Cancer Curmudgeon, suggests, I am a cranky, socially awkward type who does not easily make friends—even on the interwebs. So the few I have met and love and call “friend”—both in CancerLand and in other areas in the wonderfully weird world of online fandoms—I value deeply. For me it is the best of this thing so derided and lauded: the internet; the way I can connect with others I would never have met IRL, because of distance. Having a faker mess that up, well, it just sucks.
It’s not that it is impossible to talk to people who do not have cancer, it’s just nice to connect with fellow patients who know exactly what I mean, who’ve been there. As much as I hate to say that those who’ve never had cancer don’t “get it”—because I think sometimes as a blogger it is my job to make others “get it”—sometimes it is true, and it’s nice to be with those who “get it”, without having to explain it. So at the risk of sounding exclusionary, to have a cancer faker run around in the midst, it just makes me want to retreat back into my shell. Naturally suspicious of others, I become even less trustful, less willing to share thoughts, to reach out.
I’ll never understand Munchausen’s, if that is the actual case with this faker, seegirllive. I do not even care to try. Why someone would pretend to have cancer when I’d give anything to not have had it, just baffles me and it is not worth my time to ponder it. I just hope this whole incident dies down, goes away. I need to get back to the business of keeping the beast of my upcoming scanxiety down, of my continued physical recovery, and trying to…well, I’ll never make sense or get around that WTF just happened feeling that happens when treatment ends, but at least I’m getting better at living with that feeling. So, forget about that cancer faker, and I hope all other fakers just stop it. I’ve got healing to do, so do others, get out of our way.